Life partner? Better half? Reality or idealism?

Shohar chahay jitna bhi acha ho, aap ka apna kabhi bhi nehi hota

If you are a single and soon to be hitched girl in Pakistani society, you would hear unsolicited remarks and opinions on and about marriage and husband, his mother and life after marriage on several occasions. Wherever you are among a few women, the only thing you can see them on their faces is them reminiscing about their singles life & then smiling about it while they “this time you have now is the best time of your life. Enjoy it as much as you can“.

Since I & my friend both are soon to be hitched (InshAllah) and we both are working among bunch of aunties who have been down the path several years ago, they always give us their own opinions about husbands and marriage.

The stuff we get to hear very often is not a happy picture. Most of them will tell you how “their” house is not yours, how the mother in law is not your mother & how nobody can treat you like your own parents, ever, no matter how good a husband the Mr. Right turns out to be. One friend was quoting she used to just go out, stay out & about the whole day, doing whatever she needed to do & never answered anyone. Now she won’t leave without husband’s permission.

Then another friend quoted how she never had to ask her parents for money when she needed it & how difficult it was to ask for money from the husband in initial days after she entered the dangerous zones of holy matrimony.

Then comes the basic issue, I have been told you never sleep as peacefully in your husband’s home like you do in your parent’s. People who know me really well are aware that I sleep a lot. I love sleeping. I just can not sacrifice sleep over anyone or anything. I’d be the person who cancels out road trips just because I want to sleep in. This is a matter of serious concern to me BTW.

Coming down to the point, this got me thinking are these terms like “life partner” and “better half” just fabricated? Is the holy matrimoney all that charming as it is portrayed like the apple in Snow White? Do we really end up with the Prince in castle where we live happily ever after or is it just a trap?

I’ll figure out soon… *giggles*

I yet have to meet a married person who tells me “single life is crap. get married. this life is awesome”…If you know one, ask them to contact me.

x ZB


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